THE NORTH RIDING PROJECT

Chinese Julie’s folks owned the takeaway.  Her real name was Yu Li. She was the quietest, most introverted girl you could imagine.  She would just smile when the drunks rolled in and spewed jibes at her slanty eyes and her pancake-tits.  Then she would head through the back and jerk off the cook into their chicken chow meins.  Five minutes later she would serve up their order with her very best slanty-eyed smile.

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Whoa, whoa Julie, if you love me truly

Do you want me Julie, to be, to be your very own?

Julie love me only, Julie don’t be lonely

‘Cause I want you only, to be, to be my very  own

Shakin’ Stevens/Oh Julie, 1982