THE NORTH RIDING PROJECT

I long to see the snow leopard, yet to glimpse it by camera flash, at night, crouched on a bait, is not to see it.  If the snow leopard should manifest itself, then I am ready to see the snow leopard.  If not, then somehow (and I don’t understand this instinct, even now), I am not ready to perceive it, in the same way that I am not ready to resolve my koan; and in the not-seeing, I am content.  I think I must be disapointed, having come so far, and yet I do not feel that way.  I am disappointed, and also, I am not disappointed.  That the snow leopard is, that it is here, that its frosty eyes watch us from the mountain – that is enough.

Matthiessen/Leopard